Black Women Deserve Grace, Not Criticism
By: Jamila Gomez
Black women often endure a unique and exhausting double standard in how their actions, appearance, and behavior are judged compared to women of other races. Despite their resilience and contributions to culture, society, and history, they are frequently ridiculed for things that are celebrated or overlooked when displayed by others.
One of the most glaring examples of this double standard lies in the policing of Black women’s physical appearance. Hairstyles like braids, afros, or locs, which are deeply rooted in Black culture, are often labeled as “unprofessional” or “unkempt” in corporate settings. Meanwhile, these same styles, when adopted by non-Black women, are praised as “edgy” or “trendy.” Similarly, Black women are criticized for their naturally curvier bodies or voluptuous figures, often labeled as “too sexual” or “inappropriate.” Yet, when others undergo cosmetic procedures to mimic these features, it’s deemed desirable and aspirational.
Black women’s assertiveness is also subject to an unfair lens. When they speak up for themselves or express strong opinions, they are often branded as “angry” or “aggressive.” This harmful stereotype of the “angry Black woman” minimizes their voices, making them hesitant to advocate for themselves in professional or personal settings. In contrast, women of other races who exhibit the same assertiveness are more likely to be seen as confident and empowered.
Even in parenting, Black women face harsher judgment. Single Black mothers are disproportionately stigmatized and blamed for societal issues, despite many demonstrating incredible strength and resourcefulness. Conversely, single mothers from other backgrounds often receive sympathy and support, with their struggles seen as individual challenges rather than moral failings.
Additionally, Black women are frequently ridiculed for their cultural expressions, from their vernacular to their style. Terms like “ghetto” are used to demean behaviors or aesthetics that are intrinsic to Black communities, only for those same traits to become celebrated when co-opted by others.
This constant scrutiny creates a societal burden that forces Black women to overperform in nearly every aspect of life just to be granted basic respect. While society has made progress in recognizing these disparities, there is still a long way to go in dismantling the biases that perpetuate these double standards. Black women deserve to live authentically, without fear of judgment for simply being themselves.