Why It's Crucial to Check on Your Strong Friends: Understanding Their Silent Struggles
Photo Credit: JGalione via iStockPhoto.com
By: Jamila Gomez
We all have that friend. The one who seems to have it all together. The one who’s always there with a comforting word, a ready solution, and an unwavering smile. These are our "strong friends" – the pillars of support who we often assume don’t need anything in return. But this assumption can be dangerously misguided. Just because someone appears strong doesn’t mean they are invulnerable. Checking on your strong friends is not just a kind gesture; it is a necessary act of care and humanity.
The Burden of Being Strong
Strong friends often carry a significant emotional burden. They are the ones others turn to in times of need, which can lead to an accumulation of stress and emotional fatigue. Over time, the weight of constantly being the supporter can become overwhelming. In many cases, strong friends may not express their struggles openly, fearing they’ll disappoint those who depend on them or believing that asking for help is a sign of weakness.
The Silent Struggles
Mental health issues don’t discriminate based on outward appearances. Strong friends can suffer from anxiety, depression, and other mental health challenges just like anyone else. Their ability to mask these struggles makes it even more crucial to check in on them regularly. They may feel isolated in their strength, unable to voice their own needs because they are so used to focusing on others.
How to Check In
1. Reach Out Regularly: Make it a habit to check in with your strong friends, not just during obvious times of crisis. A simple message or call can mean the world to someone who feels like they have to keep it all together.
2. Ask Specific Questions: Instead of generic queries like “How are you?”, try asking more specific questions. “How have you been feeling lately?” or “Is there anything you’ve been struggling with?” can open up more meaningful conversations.
3. Offer Your Support: Sometimes, just knowing that someone is there for them can be incredibly comforting. Let them know that you are available to listen, to help, or simply to spend time together.
4. Listen Actively: If they do open up, listen without judgment or interruption. Validate their feelings and avoid trying to immediately solve their problems. Sometimes, they just need to be heard.
5. Encourage Self-Care: Encourage your strong friends to take time for themselves and engage in activities that help them relax and recharge. Remind them that self-care is not selfish but necessary for their well-being.
6. Be Patient: Strong friends might not immediately share their struggles. It can take time for them to feel comfortable opening up. Be patient and consistent in your support.
Why It Matters
Checking on your strong friends helps create a culture of mutual support and care. It reinforces the idea that everyone, regardless of how strong they appear, needs help sometimes. By being proactive in reaching out, you can help prevent burnout and emotional distress. Moreover, it fosters deeper and more authentic relationships, where both parties feel valued and supported.
In today’s fast-paced world, where mental health issues are increasingly prevalent, it is more important than ever to look out for one another. Our strong friends give so much of themselves to others, often without asking for anything in return. By taking the time to check on them, we acknowledge their humanity and offer them the same compassion they so readily extend to others.
So, the next time you think about your friend who always seems to have it all together, take a moment to reach out. A small gesture of care can make a big difference. After all, even the strongest pillars need support.
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