The Masks We Wear: Overcoming Fear of Judgment
By: Jamila Gomez
A friend of mine commented on a selfie I posted on my one of my social media outlets and she said, “You’re always smiling!” I humbly thanked her for the compliment and felt true gratitude for her kind words towards me. At the same time, her observation caused me to realize a real truth about myself. And it’s quite possible that others see this same truth about themselves as well. And the truth is this: it is amazing how well we tend to hide how we really feel!
Now granted, I wasn’t feeling down in the dumps that day, but I wasn’t feeling my best either. I loved the way the yellow popped against my skin and I was obsessed with the way my hair turned out and those things made me cheerful. So, naturally, I did what most people who are feeling themselves in the moment do: I took a selfie and posted it.
Once I hit ‘post’, my reality at the time came rushing back almost immediately. I had a lot on my mind. I was struggling with some things. I had considered reaching out to someone and divulging that information but decided against it because of the fear of burdening them and receiving judgment. And there was my answer. I realized that the reason we wear masks is to avoid the reception we THINK we will receive when we’re authentically us.
We tend to put on these masks and pretend to have it all together to avoid being judged when and if we really don’t. We pretend to act one way, but the reality is, we’re the complete opposite of who we POSE to be. We try so hard not to let the world know we’re falling apart and that life’s circumstances are chipping away at us little by little – all because we fear their opinions; opinions that ultimately only hold weight because we allow it. It doesn’t matter how they feel about what we’re going through, especially when they can’t be the ones to help us out of it.
There are droves of people who may be dealing with imposter syndrome, fear of judgment (rational or irrational), and fear of burdening those we care about with our issues. I am definitely one of them. I want to say that first, it’s okay. We all bow to that pressure to keep ourselves to ourselves at one point or another. But also, it’s important to know how enough you are as you are. How normal it is feel. How okay it is to not be okay. But also, how important it is to not stay that way.
Whether you’re happy as a lark or feeling like you can’t go on, it’s okay to say it either way. Granted, you do have to be mindful that not everyone around you truly cares for you and wants the best for you and you need to exercise discernment. But simply, you don’t need to wear a mask for anything outside of protecting yourself and others from COVID at this point. Let your true self shine. People will either love it or they’ll hate it. Either way, at least you’re brave enough to keep it real.
YOU MAY ALSO BE INTERESTED IN:
