10 Things You Need To Know Before Committing To A Relationship
By: Omar Cook
One of the biggest aspects of life that we deal with is the relationships that we form. Sometimes we can be so blinded by who we expect a person to be, that we ignore all of the red flags that were there before the relationship even started! And sometimes we hold on to people for way too long with a hope that we can change their ways.
Well family, it’s time to stop having undeserved expectations for people and see them for who they truly are from jump, as best we can. Rushing into a relationship can have some damaging effects on both people especially if you haven’t truly spent the time to get to know them. There’s no problem with dating without a title for a while or just simply being friends so that you can learn more about each other before taking that leap into a committed relationship.
Instead of settling or committing yourself to a relationship because you may feel lonely, take some time to really figure each other out so that you can see if a committed relationship is really what you both want. A person isn’t going to show you every single thing about them before a relationship begins, but with enough time and patience, they will show you enough! Here are 10 things you need to know before committing to a relationship!
10 Things You Need To Know Before Committing To A Relationship
Does This Person Have Goals?
In all honesty, nobody wants to be with a bum. And by bum, I mean someone who lacks the the drive and motivation to better themselves. You’ll want to know what kind of life goals the person you’re dating has for themselves and if these goals align with what you want in life. Some people may place a value on education and want to be with someone with a degree, but in this day and age, you really just want to see if someone has real plan for their life to be successful. How do they spend their time in the day? Are they working? Are they looking to level themselves up? Are they organized in their life? These are questions you will want to know so that you aren’t putting false expectations on a person that really had no expectations for themselves. Asking the right questions and paying attention to a person’s lifestyle can eliminate the fakes early.
Does This Person Practice Good Hygiene?
There’s nothing worse than dealing with a person with bad hygiene. How do they smell? Do they brush their teeth everyday? Cut their nails? Clean their ears? Sounds simple but you’ll be surprised how many people lack basic hygiene skills. Pay attention to these things early in the dating phase so that you aren’t shocked later down the line.
Does This Person Have A Spiritual Belief?
Not everyone will agree on the same spiritual beliefs so you will want to know the beliefs of the person you’re dating aligns with yours or if they even have a spiritual belief. Can you take this person to church? Can you pray with them? This is a need to know question because this can most definitely make or break a relationship, especially if two people aren’t on the same page.
What Happened In A Past Relationship That May Have Been Traumatic For Them?
You’ll want to know what kind of troubles a person dealt with in their past relationships so that you can better understand them and know how to deal with them in the right way. If a person a was cheated on in a past relationship, find out early so that you’re not surprised when you see an insecure side of them in a relationship. Knowing their past experiences will give you better understanding on what that person is willing to put up with
How Does This Person Treat Their Family?
This is a major tip into a how a person will treat you in a relationship. Observing how a person treats their closest loved ones will tell you how they value the people they associate with most. If a person has a lack of respect for their parents or siblings, what makes you think that you will be treated any different, especially when that person becomes comfortable around you?
How Is This Person With Money?
This isn’t to say that you need to date a person with big pockets. But you should observe how a person spends money and what they spend it on. Are they responsible in their spending habits? Are they willing to spend money on you? (This doesn’t have to be diamonds and pearls, but something as simple as flowers, candy, food, etc.) You will want to know how a person spends their money so that you know beforehand in a relationship what to expect. Make sure that person’s spending habits are in alignment with your expectations.
Is Sex A Necessity For Them?
Not every person looks at sex the same way so you will want to know where a person stands in their sexual desires. If you’re a person that wants to hold out until a marriage, you will want to know that the person you are with is willing to do the same. Discuss sex beforehand so you both can be on the same page and so that one person doesn’t have unreal expectations for the other.
How Does This Person Act In Social Situations?
Seeing a person out in social settings such as parties, or events is imperative before getting into a relationship. You’ll want to know if your personalities click or clash in public with the way a person acts. Are you the life of the party and they’re an introvert? This kind of observation can help you realize if you can enjoy being out in public with your significant other. Being in a relationship with a person you can’t have fun with is a recipe for disaster.
Does This Person Keep Relationships With Their Exes?
Do not wait until you’re in a relationship to find out if there is an ex from the past lingering around. Ask questions so that you know what to expect. Don’t keep quiet about this subject because you are afraid of confrontation or just don’t want to set yourself up to possibly be upset. You need to know the circumstances you’re dealing with.
10. What Are Their Morals/Political Views?
Understanding a person’s moral and political beliefs can be a deal breaker. You have to pick a person’s brain to figure out how they think about life topics because not everyone agrees one everything. You may feel passionate about a subject that your partner has no interest in. Get to know your partner and what’s in that person’s head so that you can see if you’re willing to accept that person’s views.
Don’t jump into your next relationship without having a real idea of what to expect and knowledge of possible red flags. Set yourself up to have the best relationship possible by giving yourself enough time to learn each other. With these tips and questions, you will be able to see who’s really for you in the long run!
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