Faking the Funk: 7 Signs You're Dealing With Imposter Syndrome
By: Jamila Gomez
Have you ever felt like you didn’t deserve the life you currently live? You have a great career, a loving spouse, and a healthy family. You may even be the boss at your company. Or the go-to person for a particular topic or specialty. You have all of these awesome things going on in your life, but you don’t feel like you truly earned it. You don’t feel qualified. You feel like you had to become someone else in order to live this life. And you have to stay that someone else to maintain it, or else it’ll all fall apart. Sound familiar?
If you said yes to any of this or if any of it rings any bells, you, my friend, are dealing with imposter syndrome.
You know that you are dealing with imposter syndrome when you question what you’re capable of. If you feel like you’re not being true to yourself or like the good that has happened is due to random luck or it was just out of the blue as opposed to the skills you have and the work you’ve put in, that’s imposter syndrome.
I don’t know who needs to hear this, but this type of irrational thinking can have a negative impact on your health, your relationships, and your career. And not only can it affect you, but it can affect those closest to you. And while it’s true that imposter syndrome can be brought on by how others perceive us and the words they speak over and about us, oftentimes, it comes from the way we feel about ourselves as well.
It’s a lie that we tell ourselves based on the way we feel about ourselves. And because we spend so long believing this lie, it turns into somewhat of a reality. Meaning, it manifests in ways that confirm our thoughts. For example, if you believe the lie that you’ll never get married, you may end up not meeting the person you should spend your life with because you spoke that thought into existence. You put it out into the atmosphere.
Sometimes it’s not as easy to spot in ourselves, but a tell-tell sign that you deal with imposter syndrome is if you are hyper-achieving. A lot of us feel like we have to accomplish great things in order to be seen as important or valuable. We place our value on what we think we’re capable of and whether or not we can make something happen.
Signs of Impostor Syndrome
A way to find out if you are indeed dealing with imposter syndrome, there are questions that you can ask yourself:
Do you believe you don't deserve to be happy or successful?
Do you accept compliments well?
Do you always doubt your own abilities?
Do you expect too much of yourself?
Do you have a low sense of self-worth?
Do you often allow your mind to wander down a negative road about your life/career?
Are you afraid of being unaccepted if people uncovered the real you?
If you answered yes to these questions, it’s okay. It’s not abnormal to doubt yourself every once in a while. If you make it a habit, there are ways that you can overcome it.
Talk To A Professional
Sometimes these things aren’t as easy to deal with on our own as we’d like them to be. Speaking to a professional is totally okay. No shame in that game!
Rethink Your Goals
Having goals is great and it’s necessary, but you need to make sure those goals are realistic and attainable. Don’t overdo it. One step at a time.
Reshape Your circle
Sometimes these irrational thoughts can come from the people we surround ourselves with. Make sure you reshape your circle with people who support the real you; not the you, you pretend to be.
STOP COMPARING!!!!
The main issue attached to imposter syndrome is that people are constantly comparing themselves to others. The more you use other people’s rulers to measure your own life, the more you’ll fail to measure up.
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