Following Your Own Path: Life Is Not One Size Fits All
By: Kwana Adams
If you’re someone who found yourself in a better place of circumstance, or you were fortunate to receive a promotion, a lot of money, lost a lot of weight, etc., first, let me say congratulations, and I’m really proud of you. Hard work does pay off, and you’re an example of that. However, what worked for you may not work for others, and it’s essential to keep that in mind.
Giving people advice to follow precisely in your footsteps isn’t exactly ideal. There are many other outside factors to consider. Some people don’t have the same money or resources as you. That can make it difficult for them to change their circumstances. You need money to make money, and if having cash helped you get to where you are, how can you offer advice to someone who doesn’t have any?
If you had work done on your body, you can’t tell people that they can get into the gym and receive the same results. First of all, it’s dishonest, and second of all, genetics come into play a lot in how people lose and gain weight. If your parents could pay your way through school to graduate and get a good position, how can you offer advice to someone who has to get everything on their own or doesn’t have parents who have money? If you don’t have children and can spend selfishly, how can you advise people with children to do the same?
Now, I’m not saying you can’t offer advice or detail your complete plan for anyone, but I just think it’s best not to tell people that it will definitely work for them when it probably won’t. The main thing I like to remember before I give people advice is that I am fortunate to have what I have, and some people do not have the same opportunities or resources I’ve been afforded.
Hard work is not the only way to succeed. It is the best way, but I can tell you so many stories of times I’ve worked hard and didn’t get what I wanted. I was miserable and confused because I worked so hard. Why didn’t I get the thing I wanted? Why didn’t I get the job I was so sure I was going to get? I realized that sometimes things are just not meant for me, and that’s just life.
The universe had something better in store for me, and I just had to be patient. So for me to just say, “work hard!” is just not realistic when things don’t always turn out as planned. I try to apply this same kind of thinking before I offer my two cents. Yes, I can tell people exactly how I got to where I got while also keeping in mind that my path is mine and no one else’s. You can take what I gave you and tailor it yourself and to your life situations, creating a path that’s yours and no one else’s.
So before you give people advice, just remember that life is not one size fits all. Not everyone can follow your path precisely, and it’s not fair to expect them to. There are a lot of questions that need to be asked before we can help people. Just remember to be mindful that you may have privileges that others don’t when you’re providing advice to them. Or, if you’re not sure if anyone would receive your advice very well, you can simply just mind your business until they ask.
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