The Spectacle Of Self-Love: A Radical Approach To Self-Love And Appreciation

By: Cory Utsey

Self-love is defined as holding one’s happiness and well-being in high standing. We live in a world that markets off of the internalized hate and insecurities of its inhabitants; therefore, any movement towards self-love is as necessary as it is valid.

Straying away from the status quo, and placing true priority on one’s health and mental well-being, is a radical act in and of itself. However, the true power of self-love is at times lost to the same market and commercialization as insecurity.

Self-love has become a spectacle-- it is often written off as an aesthetic that can be achieved with superficial affirmations and skincare routines, rather than engaging in true transformation of self.

Any first-step towards self-prioritization is still valid, but simple, easy actions cannot be viewed as the fullest extent to which one can show love and care to themselves. Approaching self-love with a sense of radicalism is the key to feeling it in its most genuine form.

Poet, activist and author Sonya Renee Taylor cites radical self-love as the ultimate point of access to the highest form of self, and it requires the complete dismantling of society’s standards on how someone should look. One would even serve to benefit from the complete decentering of physical looks and attractiveness as a measure of self-worth. 

When considering the ways in which one can build self-love, people are often told to form a sense of confidence around the way that they look, but in reality, beauty and attractiveness are too relative of concepts to actually validate one’s sense of self.  

It is not a bad thing to desire beauty, or even to achieve it, but the focus should be less on how beautiful someone is, and more on the fact that one’s values, morals and mere existence are valid enough for them to be deserving of love-- especially when it comes from within.

Radical self-love challenges the typical, physique-based conceptions of self-love by placing an emphasis on action rather than feelings. It requires the choice to work on one’s mental, emotional, and physical health, while unlearning toxic habits and tendencies. Radical self-love has no particular form, as it can be employed by means of gratitude, reflection, or positive thinking. But “positivity” is not necessarily inherent in employing radical self-love.

Everyone has bad days, intrusive thoughts, and bouts of negative thinking; therefore, it would be unrealistic to assume fake optimism in the face of adversity. Instead, radical self-love means accepting that certain circumstances will not always be social media ready. It entails an understanding in the fact that it is okay to feel negative emotion as long as it is also acknowledged that those feelings will eventually pass.

Radical self-love is self-acceptance. Radical self-love is the creation and maintenance of boundaries. Radical self-love is being aware of the fact that we are all deserving of a joyous existence in which self-doubt has no agency over our actions or feelings. 

To be radical in any action is to take extreme measures for change, and in some cases, it is the complete dissolution of disease and any disease-ridden tissue within the body.

Though self-hate, insecurity, and self-deprecation are not literal diseases, they are still psychological ailments that plague the body and completely corrupt the way that individuals prioritize their health and happiness-- and they cannot be beat with that easy, aesthetically pleasing form of self-love. 

So be intentional. Be mindful. Be radical, and choose self-love as a form of radicalism.

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